So, this past month of January has been a rough one. My Ed has done shit and I’m trying to come back from it, however it’s hard when someone has a hard time moving on from it. I feel like I’m being punished for my Ed’s action and no matter what I do, it isn’t good enough. I feel, for the first time ever, like a stranger who overstayed her welcome here. I’m struggling with feeling peace now and not sure how to go about it. I wonder if I made the right decision and wonder if perhaps moving into the apartment would be better for me. I want to save any relationship I have left with her. I’m very sad and a lot more guarded. I don’t know what GOD has planned for me and I need to trust the process. even still, it doesn’t take that fear away.